I am copying dear Tommy's idea and answering Vanity Fair's Proust Questionnaire. I have thought of my own answers every time I've read it in the magazine anyway so I thought they might be interesting to actually write down.
1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
Being with my favorite people, with good food, wine, and either a fire or sunshine. Being whole.
2. What is your greatest fear?
Being 90 and wishing I would have done more.
3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
My girlish insecurities (that can be paralyzing.)
4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Dishonesty.
5. Which living person do you most admire?
My mother.
6. What is your greatest extravagance?
Plane tickets. One day I hope it will be shoes.
7. What is your current state of mind?
Frustrated and disappointed, but hopeful. (Tomorrow it will already be different.)
8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Prudence.
9. On what occasion do you lie?
I don't. I'm incapable of it. Oops that's a lie - once in a while when I say I was going to call someone when I really wasn't. Only if it's insignificant to both me and them.
10. What do you most dislike about your appearance?
Bad skin.
11. Which living person do you most despise?
Kurt Tobolski.
12. What is the quality you most like in a man?
Confidence.
13. What is the quality you most like in a woman?
Loyalty.
14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
"Right?!?" and ".. so ..." as in "I so agree" or "I so wouldn't do that."
15. What or who is the greatest love of your life?
So far I'm not ready to put this in print.
16. When and where were you happiest?
April - June 2007, mostly in Fayetteville, NC.
17. Which talent would you most like to have?
The ability to move on from emotional stress after I've paid it enough attention.
18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I wouldn't get my heart tangled up so easily.
19. What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Being able to feel joy over the last year.
20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be?
A well cared for cat.
21. Where would you most like to live?
I would most like to want to live wherever I am living at the moment.
Madison, Granada, Galway, San Francisco.
22. What is your most treasured possession?
A CD my brother made me for Christmas one year.
23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Visiting a morgue to identify a loved body.
24. What is your favorite occupation?
Teacher. (Note - this does not mean I want it to be my occupation.)
25. What is your most marked characteristic?
My height combined with love of high heels and ability to talk to anyone in the room no matter how much they have to tilt up.
26. What do you most value in your friends?
Loyalty, honesty, and patience.
27. Who are your favorite writers?
Pablo Neruda, Dr. Suess, William Shakespeare
28. Who is your hero of fiction?
Wesley.
29. Which historical figure do you most identify with?
I don't identify personally with any historical figure.
30. Who are your heroes in real life?
My mother and my sister.
31. What are your favorite names?
Ava, John, Stella, Leah, Michael, Raul, Eve, Caitlin, Megan, Brendan
32. What is it that you most dislike?
Feeling left behind.
33. What is your greatest regret?
Not keeping better track of the big pastel drawing my brother did for me five years ago.
34. How would you like to die?
Happily, peacefully, quickly but not suddenly, and almost last.
35. What is your motto?
"I'm just livin' the dream..."
31 July 2009
27 July 2009
Glynnspring
This weekend most of my large Irish/German family (Mom's side) will be gathering at the family farm in Wisconsin for the annual reunion. I won't be going this year which is always a little sad.
My mother is one of ten children that grew up on this dairy farm, which has been in the family since my grandfathers' grandfather bought it. There are more than twenty of us first cousins that grew up visiting and playing on the farm. All of us have collections of memories of our Grandma&Grandpa hosting us when we were children. Most of us were at one point or another taken "camping" by Grandpa, which involved what felt like a cross-country trek on the tractor that ended miraculously upon arrival at Aunt Molly's (his sister) house, which geographically is only some miles from Grandpa's. Some of us would go to church with Grandma, because I know for a lot of us since we didn't go with our parents it felt fun. Grandpa would take us to Doug's Pub in town, where we would get soda and a bag of chips as he drank beer and solved the problems of the world with the other old men.
Only as we've gotten older have we realized how special this place is. My grandfather passed away not suddenly but quite unexpectedly in 1999, and my grandmother followed after a long and debilitating illness in 2002. Since, the ten siblings have formed an LLC that parcels ownership and responsibility equally among them. Part of the reason for the annual reunion is to sort out any family business regarding financial decisions and the farm.
As mortality becomes more a reality the siblings have begun to think more concretely about what will come next for this land that is collectively and individually a part of our history. Eventually, hopefully in many years, my mother and her siblings will die and mine will be the oldest generation. My cousins and I are removed from the farm as only one of us have ever lived there. I think we all feel, some more than others most likely, the importance and significance of the place and most of us would be willing to start inputting more to keep it in the family and maintain it.
The question is how and who more than anything I think. Do some of us want it more than others? Perhaps. Ultimately our parents will decide what they think is best for the place and for us, their children, but as most of my generation has a foothold in what we'd call 'adulthood', and we are of this family - we will no doubt be long on opinions.
My hope is that we can keep this place for my children, and even my children's children. I appreciate that most families don't have this home, this place that holds their history and so many connections. I understand that a physical place isn't necessary to be a close family, and if anything should ever happen to our place I think we would find a way to be as close.
My mother is one of ten children that grew up on this dairy farm, which has been in the family since my grandfathers' grandfather bought it. There are more than twenty of us first cousins that grew up visiting and playing on the farm. All of us have collections of memories of our Grandma&Grandpa hosting us when we were children. Most of us were at one point or another taken "camping" by Grandpa, which involved what felt like a cross-country trek on the tractor that ended miraculously upon arrival at Aunt Molly's (his sister) house, which geographically is only some miles from Grandpa's. Some of us would go to church with Grandma, because I know for a lot of us since we didn't go with our parents it felt fun. Grandpa would take us to Doug's Pub in town, where we would get soda and a bag of chips as he drank beer and solved the problems of the world with the other old men.
Only as we've gotten older have we realized how special this place is. My grandfather passed away not suddenly but quite unexpectedly in 1999, and my grandmother followed after a long and debilitating illness in 2002. Since, the ten siblings have formed an LLC that parcels ownership and responsibility equally among them. Part of the reason for the annual reunion is to sort out any family business regarding financial decisions and the farm.
As mortality becomes more a reality the siblings have begun to think more concretely about what will come next for this land that is collectively and individually a part of our history. Eventually, hopefully in many years, my mother and her siblings will die and mine will be the oldest generation. My cousins and I are removed from the farm as only one of us have ever lived there. I think we all feel, some more than others most likely, the importance and significance of the place and most of us would be willing to start inputting more to keep it in the family and maintain it.
The question is how and who more than anything I think. Do some of us want it more than others? Perhaps. Ultimately our parents will decide what they think is best for the place and for us, their children, but as most of my generation has a foothold in what we'd call 'adulthood', and we are of this family - we will no doubt be long on opinions.
My hope is that we can keep this place for my children, and even my children's children. I appreciate that most families don't have this home, this place that holds their history and so many connections. I understand that a physical place isn't necessary to be a close family, and if anything should ever happen to our place I think we would find a way to be as close.
26 July 2009
I get to be in Madison for a quick weekend at the end of next month and I am so happy I get to see this...
http://77square.com/arts/visualarts/story_459399
http://77square.com/arts/visualarts/story_459399
21 July 2009
I Know
"Those who say do not know and those who know do not say."
This tidbit was shared with me by my new friend who was helping me trying to convince myself that being responsible was a good thing. (In this case being responsible was not shucking everything on my to-do list just to spend an hour or two with him.)
It was apparently written by Lao Tzu in the Tao Te Ching. I have not idea if that's spelled correctly or even what that is, but boy did it speak to me.
This tidbit was shared with me by my new friend who was helping me trying to convince myself that being responsible was a good thing. (In this case being responsible was not shucking everything on my to-do list just to spend an hour or two with him.)
It was apparently written by Lao Tzu in the Tao Te Ching. I have not idea if that's spelled correctly or even what that is, but boy did it speak to me.
16 July 2009
Thank you, Dear Old Love, for this sums up my longest and least successful relationship perfectly:
"KNOW WHEN TO FOLD THEM
One magical night with you somehow turned into two unhappy years. I wish we’d left it as a one-night stand."
One magical night with you somehow turned into two unhappy years. I wish we’d left it as a one-night stand."
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