I woke up with my head on his shoulder facing away from him. I studied his lower arm, the design of his moles and hair, that led to his strong hand that works hard but knows exactly how to touch my hair or hold my own.
The muted early sunlight was on the bed and the veins in his arm built a topographic map of his skin. I could feel him breathing behind me in the soft gentle pattern that meant he was about to stir. Although I wanted to hear his voice I wanted more for him to sleep peacefully next to me for just a few moments longer.
I felt sad that I had to say goodbye to him in some hours, but it was ok. I felt more calm and safe with him than I do at any other place I can think of. I knew I would see him again soon, I know that because we have applied no rules to each other it won't be a desperate rushed meeting. Any time we have together is surplus.
I kept wanting to say words to him that would change the rules, so I didn't. Instead I drew a heart on a piece of paper and put it on his pillow. When I woke up the day after he left I felt almost euphorically happy, embracing the joy I feel just to know I get to have him in my life.