17 May 2010

How About Not.

I probably don't owe you.  If I tolerate you putting your emotions on me, it's because I am a kind and generous person.  And, you probably just created an awkward situation that I would rather walk away from than make you feel bad about, because I generally don't like to be the cause of other people feeling bad.
Please don't confuse you saying something to make yourself feel better with saying something just to to put it out in the open.  Because most times, if you're not sure how I was "going to take it", it's probably something I didn't really need to hear.  Especially if we have for the most part a casual relationship.  Just because I'm nice and you've imagined there may be more happening doesn't mean I want to know any more about you than I already know.  You may have thought you needed to tell me, but really, and let's be honest with ourselves here, you really just wanted me to know.  Please don't act like you're acting from a selfless place. 

I know that I don't need to respond any which way, and actually I don't need to respond at all.  I know that.  I may or may not when I get my head sorted out, but you may not want to hear what I have to say to you.  If your therapist, or friend, or inner voice, or whatever, told you that maybe you should just be open with me, maybe think twice about whether or not I'm really going to want to hear what you have to say.  Maybe, just maybe, you may be turning an otherwise nice day in the opposite direction for me.  So maybe keep your mouth shut.

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